Don't Treat Me Like A Child!!!

It's funny how guys think they have you figured out when they are so far from it. You have to remember that I have nine brothers and tons of male cousins to go araound. If I act indifferent or distant because I am not that girl who acts needy or need attention all the time but it would be nice that you don't treat me like a toy because I will try you like shit in return. Maybe it's the way that my independence scares you and you can't handle someone like me, huh???

You know who you are!!!!

What I Am! Yours or Not!

I am sitting here thinking about a conversation I had with Phoenix yesterday. I feel like I have to always clarify what I do in life with him. Well, technically it's none of his or your business.

Since you are so interested here it is.

I am a music producer, writer (everything from a novel to a short story to screen scripts) and film indy movies under another name with my crew. I care very much about my privacy.

I am a mother and daughter!

I believe in justice, and fighting for the rights of people,therefore I am studying to be a lawyer. I am a visionary. I believe in my own beliefs and I research about everything from life to religions.

But most of all I am ME!

You either love me unconditionally with all the hair brain ideas and put up with me and love my children or don't even bother being with me. I am what I am!!!!

Clarify My Scandalous Tells

Since I have posted on my blog, I have had about twenty million emails and text messages plus a few nasty voice mails, but I could careless.

 I do want to clarify something right now.

I have never slept with all these guys just three; I have mentioned.

Superman, of course he was my boyfriend,

Boy Toy a very long time ago (maybe about 1 year ago or 2)

and the new guy Phoenix.

So you can think what you want, too!

My Many Escapades

***NOTE***I know that everyone be tripping about my blog. I do my best to not mention names or give anything else out to who there identity is but if you feel like I am talking about you than maybe I am or someone like you. I will not sugar coat for you or anyone else.

On a better note, I am looking for new ideas for my apartment and I would like to know how to go about finding my personality type for it and things like that. I am very open to new possibilities. So what I am going to do is a contest so stay tune for the rules and updates.

Here are some ideas below, I wish my apartment looked like this but this isn’t.

Kiss and Tell????

Now a days, guys seem to lack so much in the creativity department. They have no passion or romance. Guys are just too boring and unamusing, for a lack of better words. This July 4th weekend was a complete bust. From the family doing there own thing to the men that called like crazy. I am not too picky on the company I keep but it made me think that maybe I should start to be really picky from now on. As all you know my five day weekend started on Thursday. I was with Phoenix a day or so before this weekend started. I enjoyed the time with him a little but I get this gut feeling that we are not okay. We went to a place to be alone but it seemed to really pull us apart instead of making us closer. Wisconsin was beautiful that day, too. Everything was perfect until we got to the secret hideout for us both. The conversation was good but I felt really distant from him and I still don’t understand why. So, I just pulled away quietly from him and let him have some space.

As the weekend was approaching, I was getting calls from guys like crazy. Well, EDP (Extra Desperate Poser) was texting like crazy to everyone about his little trip to Chicago, with his hotel number on it. Wow! I believe you use Twitter for the mayor details not text messaging. Anyway, like I actually care. Superman was calling me like crazy as usual and that was okay with me until we started arguing about something I can’t remember, it might of been his jealousy again. I truly hate jealous guys. They just annoy me. You have not met my favorite guy, his name is Sex Crazed Freak. SCF was texting me like crazy about all the things he wanted to do to me, which it made me hot in a really weird way. SCF is always a gentlemen to me. I love the conversations we have whether they are about sex or everyday life. Now, one thing about him is that his married. For some reason, married men know how to be discreet and gentlemen. You probably thinking that this girl must be a call girl or a slut. I am neither! I will tell you exactly what I am, a Badass Player. My fans would say differently and call me a realist of relationships. I am like you in a sense that I am trying to figure out what goes into a relationship and try to correct my mistakes with the help of others. So, let me get back.

The calls were pouring in on Thursday and Friday. I couldn’t even decided who I wanted to spend the weekend with. I had this guy I met come over to talk but I felt uncomfortable off the bat. Like if I missed something the first time I met him. Well, he turned out to be an almost rapist. He wanted to have sex like right when he got to my place. I love sex but that was a bit too much and Rapist didn’t understand the word NO! I was so upset that I kicked him out of my place. Luckily, I live in an apartment building with much security. He totally just ticked me off, then there’s Mama Boy, who just keeps bugging me to come over my house. Dude still lives with his mom, has no job and no car. So, I just left him hanging. If you are 30 something years old and still lives with your parents please move on. Oh, wait! This guy you have to meet. His name is Total Loser, you know the kind that say I love you or texts you “Do you miss me?” I barely know you to feel either. I don’t believe that you can meet someone at love at first sight or be in love within a week of knowing someone. I am a skeptic totally when it comes to love and relationships. TL has been totally begging me to hangout or meet as he refers to things. He complains all the time about being lonely or that he should be dead because I won’t text or call back. Now weirdo! God, I would be totally scared to do anything with this type of guy because he can become a potential stalker type. Scary! I wonder if his the type of guy who likes abuse. Huh? Anyway, than there is Needy Loser. You know the one who wants to be in a serious relationship but for personal gain type. He actually got the nerve to ask me to put him on my cell phone plan. Not! Do you think I am that stupid? He wants to have a baby with me. Hello! I have 4 already don’t need anymore munchkins running around especially when mines are almost over 18 years old. I love kids but I am not a baby machine. Than his also with that damn I love you speech bullshit. He calls like clock work and won’t stop calling. As of this blog, he has left 10 messages, which I will just totally delete. There is more but I will leave you with two more types of guys. This are on my favorite list for now until they do something really stupid, which they haven’t so far. Cool Cat and Boy Toy. Now Cool Cat is planning on coming to see me today and Boy Toy is always a blast when it comes to partying. Boy Toy and I have been BFF since like forever. His totally younger than me but his mature for a guy his age. He knows how to party and not bring romantic hassles at the parties. I mean his romantic with me in private but when we in public there is no romantic hassles. He knows where he stands with me. I schooled him really good. What’s funny is how we met! I was with Jade at a nightclub in Shakopee, MN when I ran into him. He just turned 21 and was so wasted that his friends and us where walking out the same time and these other guys where trying to pick us up but his guy friends new that we didn’t want to talk to them that they helped us. So Boy Toy was tripping over his feet and so when he saw me he jumped over the car slid right into the snow bank and got up to kiss me. Multiple of times. I was hooked on his craziness. So we been BFF ever since. Cool Cat is one of those guys where you can hangout and a new adventure just pops out. We always have a blast together but we never got to crossover to anything from it and I think its because he doesn’t want to fuck things up which I totally understand but I think he will be so good in bed that it makes my mouth watery.

Will see how things go????

 

Fantasies: Part One

They say fantasy and reality shall not ever meet. I live in a city that brings fantasy to a whole new level. Minneapolis is full of night life but when you are about to go to bed the real parties come out and play. There is an underground fantasy clubs and a vampire clubs. They are strictly by invite only. Both are full of sex and magic exploration. You never know where they will be held at neither except for that text you get on the moment. Its always a new location and people that go there. The VIP are the only ones who get to invite and choice locale.

Personally, I go to both. I am just glad they never cross the same day. The events are extremely secretive and very dangerous. It’s pure fun and wild. I will touch on Fantasy clubs first. I am very curious on the sex scene. They way people just put there costumes and pretend to be a dominatrix, toe fetishes, leather clad men and men that want to dress as women but are not gay. I am pretty open to fantasies for both sexes. I hangout there for the research on sex and how to accomplish a fantasy with flaw. I love the people that be there and how great they interact with one another.

I know I will get a lot of emails and much questions but please remember I can only say so much. I have to respect their privacy and I am not allowed to write too much details and about people’s names. So I try not to use real names unless I get permission or if they give me a nickname they go under.  This club are very exclusive and exotic too.

Here’s an except from my new book “Forbidden Fantasies”

I walked through the alley way to seek for the door to the basement of an establishment. There was a group of ladies trying to get into the place but I am not allowed to let them in so I waited around. They didn’t know the secret password or the door to knock on. Finally, after a few minutes one of the ladies walked up to me and ask how they could get in the place. I said “do you have an invite?” and she said “no”. I was like great these people trying to get into a place they are not invited too. I explain to them that I couldn’t get in without it. “Sorry” I said and walked to the door and gave them the password to get in. I would of helped them but I was invited and didn’t need the extra attention from anyone today because today I am someone else totally. Leather, lace and on the prowl for something new and different. When I walk through the castle doors I already knew that this will be a fairy tail theme and my happiness even for a moment will be fulfilled in 3, 2, 1 wow my prince charming grinning at me. This will be a night to remember.

Solos Tu & Yo!!!

I sometimes I  wonder what would happen when  you don’t follow your path or fate. Can it just be totally written and how can you change it? And if you do change it what actually happens? I have so many questions but not enough answers. I look in different religions and different cultures to look for those answers but nothing. I actually come up with nothing. Can you believe that is so hard to swallow?

I will find that answers to that one day but not today I guess.

“There is only the walk you seek to fulfill but there’s no actual right or wrong path just the one that is meant for you.” –Sex Kitten